Sunday 22 April 2018

Career-Oriented or Career-Blind?

It’s been two days, just two days. My partner is travelling for some work and I am all by myself at home. I can already feel how my life would be a vacuum without him now. One thing I know for sure, and it’s not the first time this thought has come to me, that I would trade any riches of the world for him, any given day, any given time. It's another thing when there's no one you share your life with, but you once have someone, how can you ever do without them? 

I am not jobless. This declaration is important to my further discussion or many would like to assume that I am. In fact, I might be working more than many of these ‘assuming’ people. And no, it’s not just washing dishes and cleaning cobwebs.

Moving forward, I am not blindly in love either. I don’t believe in the phrase ‘blind in love’. Love is a human emotion, the apex of all. And when you are in love with someone, you do things for them which you might not do otherwise. That’s okay; it’s not being blind but simply being in love. It is to be together, loyal and loving to each other. If it’s madness, be it so.

Coming to the point which I am to actually discuss, career choices made by us, both men and women. Some part the discussion focuses more on women, but not at all to be sexist, I shapath (promise)!

Why do we always have to choose between love and career? Why us, why women always? No, you don’t. I know many women have to go through this phase, but out of those, quite a lot of them do so happily. I don’t mean completely leaving your career but compromising a bit on how you planned to go about it.

And here’s my actual point of debate. Most (Read ‘A lot of’ if you please) women make their own choices, which is fine. But why do we need to defend our decisions and choices behind the curtain of pseudo-feminism? I repeat, not feminism but pseudo-feminism. Feminism doesn't imply that you can ride over men. 

I for one had always been a career-oriented girl, now a woman (Wow!). I still am. My family instilled this in me, my parents to be more accurate. But the value of human relations never faded in front of all the glamour of bank notes. I will ever be thankful to my parents for this. Money indeed is important, for your necessities, for your luxuries, etc. but, my friend, not for your happiness. Having all luxuries not necessarily mean you will be happy or successful. Yes.

My point is that you can be successful without your bank account showing 10, 9, 8, or even 7 digit figures. Also, I don’t think that after a long day at work, one will simply come home, check their bank balance, and feel relieved and happy. Does it give that much warmth, love, and understanding a human is capable of bestowing?

For the fear of being misunderstood, I emphasise again, there is no harm in earning a lot of money. But is it worth trading the one you love? Or the one who loves you back, often unconditionally? If a person loves you, they understand your dreams and aspirations like no other. Metaphorically speaking, they will climb mountains so that you can fulfil your ambitions. But, you need to trust them.

Kintsugi, the Japenese art of fixing broken things with gold. You will get the reference somewhere in the text. 


I am talking about a certain group of people. There are people who destroy such amazingly beautiful relations just for the sake of making a bit more money. That money you earn can buy your tickets to the pub on weekends but trust me, five or ten years down the lane, you would wish there was someone who would just slip in the blanket with you and watch a classic movie together, ordering dinner from a local joint.

All those expensive restaurants will lose its glamour and you will crave a cup of coffee made by the person you left behind, broken and confused on where they went wrong.
And one of those days, you will bump into him, all healed by a woman who timely judged the value of real diamonds in life. All his cracks would be filled up by this woman, with golden love, like beautiful art.

And you will stand there wishing you could trade something out of your expensive possessions, to earn one priceless moment like this. The girl he is holding now would appear to be so successful, with a prize no one could ever compete to win, not again!


Note: The above thing applies as much to men, as to women. Moreover, I am not against being career oriented, but career blind. When two people are in love, they should make decisions together. There is a need to compromise in every relation, be it parent-child, brother-sister, or lovers.

But if you aren’t inclined towards love, that’s fine too. You can decide what you want for your life but that's applicable only when you have sorted out your priorities well in advance. You have no right to destroy someone’s life midway saying you need to part ways because Hey! I have other priorities, I forgot to tell you.

My reason to write this isn’t to attack anyone, and I hope it is clear by now that I am not being judgemental but reasonable enough given the kind of people I am talking about. Far too many marriages, relationships, and families are breaking these days due to the inability to prioritize the important things in life at the correct time.


On our way to advancement, we should not leave behind what’s more essential and what ultimately matters in life! Who do you think would cry once you die? Definitely not your 4BHK or your Audi for that matter!